Business To Go: 1961 Citroën 2CV Truckette

Conventional wisdom would suggest that the middle of a global pandemic is a bad time to start a business...but that same wisdom would have told Bill Gates to get a job at Radio Shack or Howard Hughes to become a journeyman aircraft mechanic...so I'm going to throw convention into the wind like an empty toilet paper roll and suggest you start a business with this next vehicle.  What kind of business, you say?  Oh...good point.  You tell me in the comments.  Find this 1961 Citroën 2CV truckette offered for $18900 in South Lake Tahoe, CA via craigslist.  Tip from Tim.

French Bread: 1968 Citroën 2CV

The Citroen (Citroën) 2CV (en français -- deux chevaux)  was a front drive economy car that had prototype builds starting in 1939 with innovative features like a flat-twin aircooled engine and seats that could be removed from the car and used as picnic chairs. Find this 1968 Citroën 2CV offered for $4300 in Fort Plain, CA via craigslist. Tip from Rock On!

Citroen or Citroën: 1986 Hoffman 2CV Cabrio

If the original 2CV isn't strange enough for your garage, you might want to consider a Hoffman 2CV...wow that sounded like a good idea when it was in my head, but now that I read it on paper..yikes.  Anyway, back in the late 1980s a German bloke named Wolfgang Hoffman decided to sell a kit car cabrio body using glass reinforced plastic, steel frame, and running gear from a 2CV that the buyer provided.  Typically, a kit car will transform the original into something exotic -- a Beetle becomes a 356 Speedster, or a Fiero becomes a Ferrari, or a Eldorado becomes a Batmobile, but the Hoffman kit takes 2CV drivetrain parts and makes a...2CV.  Find this 1986 Hoffman 2CV Cabrio offered for $15,600 in Williamsburg, VA via hemmings. Tip from Rock On!

Two Chevrons Up: 1961 Citroen 2CV

The Citroen (Citroën) 2CV (en français -- deux chevaux)  was a front drive economy car that had prototype builds starting in 1939 with innovative features like a flat-twin aircooled engine and seats that could be removed from the car and used as picnic chairs.  I think that enough time has passed that we can all forget about how many times we needed to wait for a tow truck or how much money we spent at Pierre's French Car Repair & Seafood Buffet -- and agree that this would be awesome to have as a fun weekend car.  Find this 1961 Citroen 2CV offered for $7,500 in Cincinnati, OH via craigslist.

Was Cleaning My Garage & Found This: 1960 Citroën 2CV Truckette

Let's not mince words on this one.  This next car is going to be a terrible automobile by any modern yardstick.  It is slower than anything on the road, handles like skateboard riding on a whale carcass, is unreliable as gas station sushi, and is about as dangerous as driving around urban Detroit with your Takata airbag wiried to the horn switch.  However...I can just about guarantee that every single time you plunk your rear into one of those hammock seats in this rolling tuna can, you will do so with a mile wide grin plastered across your face.  Find this 1960 Citroën 2CV Truckette here on eBay bidding for $6,600 in Louisburg, KS with 2 days to go.

Do Shove -- Ah? 1965 Citroën 2CV Truckette

The Citroen (Citroën) 2CV (en français -- deux chevaux)  was a front drive economy car that had prototype builds starting in 1939 with innovative features like a flat-twin aircooled engine and seats hung like hammocks from the roof with wife wires (really, this is true).  Unfortunately a nasty global war broke out a few months later and Germany occupied France (yaddy yaddah) and the 2CV en masse production until 1948....but it lasted well into the 20th century.  Find this 1965 Citroën 2CV Truckette offered for $16,250 in Woodland Hills, CA via craigslist.

Le Sami: 1968 Citroen 2CV, Suzuki Frame and SBC

Anything fusion is hot these days, particularly with the foodies.  Imagine you go to a trendy underground restaurant and order "the chef's special" and this thing comes out on your plate.  On the outside it looks like a crêpe, but it is sitting on a bed of seaweed and sticky rice, and it is filled with the best damn Memphis style pulled pork you've ever had.  That my friends, is nirvana.  Once your belly is full, you'll need something to haul yourself home - why not use this 1968 Citroen 2CV On a Suzuki Samurai Frame here on eBay currently bidding for $5,600 with 5 days to go, located in Boyne City, MI.  Tip from Pablo.

10k: Buffet Concerto: 1980 Citroën Dyane Faux Tanker

The bulk of this writer's experience with European car culture has been in eastern France, where draconian laws dictate that classic cars must be original and modification is almost banned.  It isn't as bad as Shanghai, where customizing a car is punishable with hard time in a Uyghur prison camp, but compared to the USA, the customizing scene is pretty tame.  Italy is more of mystery to me (having only spent time there as a tourist) but it seems that the laws must be based on Texas vehicle code and turning your 2CV in a faux tanker truck/buffet is just another weekend filled with welding fumes and cheap Chianti.  Find this 1980 Citroën Dyane Faux Tanker/Buffet offered for 7.200 € ($9,300 at time of printing) in Merano, Italy via subito.it. Update, I originally called this piece of tanker-art a 2CV per the sellers suggestion, but Jalopnik Editor-in-Citroën Jason Torchinsky pointed out that this is a Dyane...and 2CVhoonage said it might have started as the panel van version of the Dyane, called the Arcadyane.

10k: Three Wheels Of Fun: 1992 Citroën 2CV Lomax 223

The 2CV, known colloquially as the deux chevaux (two horses), was a Toute Petite Voiture (compact) designed in the '30s by the French automaker Citroën.  In 1938 there was this war, with Nazis, tanks, occupation, all kinds of horrible stuff, and post-war France regressed into what they called the Grey Years as most of the pre-war cars had been destroyed or militarized or both. The devastated French population, now under a post-war French-Socialist government (1944) regressed to an earlier style of transportation, with horse drawn carriages and government dictated resource rationing further delayed the production of the 2CV.  Finally, in 1948, 2CV production started in earnest and didn't stop until 1990.  Find this 1992 Citroën 2CV Lomax 223 for sale in Aspiran, France for $15,000 or best offer via ebay.